Misdirection Quotes

“I was a hooker in a past life... a rug hooker.”

“I like to play chess with old men in the park. The tough part is finding 32 of them.”

“My girlfriend said, 'I'm leaving you.' I said, 'Who is he?'”

“If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers.”

“So I went to the dentist. He said, 'Say aaah.' I said, 'Why?' He said, 'My dog's died.'”

“I'm against hunting. In fact, I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox.”