Shelley Berman

“A great deal of my material has to do with my own personal anxieties.”

“I've been in and out of Wall Street since 1929.”

“The morning after my high school graduation, I had a cup of coffee and a doughnut. After that I had a career.”

“My comedy is not mine. It's a gift. I'm not that smart.”

“Comedy is a story, a joke is a story, a situation is a story. I'm a storyteller.”

“I don't think I'm a star. I'm a craftsman. I'm a journeyman. I'm a professional.”

“The most persistent sound which reverberates through men's history is the beating of war drums.”

“You can't be a comedian without being an actor.”

“I'm not a political comedian. I'm a social comedian.”

“The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.”