Hal Sparks

“I would define my comedy as 'angry observation.'”

“I was a weirdo. I wasn't picked on or anything. And I wasn't smarter than the other kids; that's not why I didn't fit in. I've always had this weird anxiety. I hated recess.”

“Rock and roll is a contact sport. I enjoy playing the tunes that really get the people going.”

“My main thing is I'm a political analyst. I'm not a political pundit. I'm not a commentator. I'm not a talking head.”

“I'm a political analyst. I'm a political wonk. I read everything I can get my hands on.”

“Belief is a shelter, a prison, a kingdom.”

“I think the greatest thing in the world is to be self-sufficient.”

“The only real good technology is no technology at all. Technology is taxation without representation, imposed by our elitist species upon the rest of the natural world.”

“Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people.”

“I've been a vegetarian since I was a kid. I'm not a strict vegan, because I'm a hedonist and I don't want to give up cheese.”