John C. McGinley

“Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. You're wrong. You're wrong. You're wrong.”

“Relationships don't work the way they do on television and in the movies. Will they? Won't they? And then they finally do, and they're happy forever. Gimme a break.”

“Nothing in this world that's worth having comes easy.”

“Do you not understand that you are a very, very small cog in a very, very big machine?”

“Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present, Man Not Caring.”

“People are bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling.”

“For the last time, I'm not your mentor, I'm not your friend, I'm not your brother, I'm not your father. I am your boss, and you will do as I say.”

“I'm not sad. I'm furiously indifferent.”

“I have to go now. I have to go punish my impossibly perfect child for being a better person than I am.”

“Let me tell you something, Newbie. If you’re not a little bit scared every day you’re a doctor, then you’re not a very good doctor.”

“Things are never as bad as they seem. They're always worse.”

“The hospital is a cruel, cruel mistress, and she will crush your soul... enjoy.”

“That, right there, is the essence of my plight. I am, and will forever be, surrounded by idiots.”

“I suppose I could be a little nicer, but then I'd be a little less me.”

“Life is not a tidy little box. It's a glorious, messy, hideous, beautiful, chaotic thing.”